My Personal Nightmare (with Assistance)

So, I have in one week hired and subsequently fired a personal assistant.

Last week, I hired a very nice girl as my personal assistant. She didn't strike me as particularly FABULOUS - but she was the ONLY person to respond to the telemarketing part of the position with enthusiasm. And she was a clogger! She couldn't be all bad, if she was a clogger. Well, her recommendations were pretty good - not excellent - just OK. None of them commented on her stellar work ethic or superb organizational methods, but they did say that she was reliable and of high integrity. Well, I'm guessing that we must have been speaking about two different people here because I found neither attribute.

During week one (her only week), she worked 2 hours on Monday (that's all I really had time for) and six hours on Tuesday (during which I bought her lunch). She was planning on going out of town on Wednesday but not until AFTER coming to work. Well, Wednesday morning I get a call from her wondering if it would be all right if she came in a little late becasue she needed to have her tires rotated. I told her that it would be fine and I again emphasized that I could be flexible as long as she kept me informed. Around noon, she called back to say that she was still sitting at the tire place and asked if she could just come in next Wednesday (she was returning from her trip on Tuesday). I said I understood and I would see her after her trip.

So, at 9:00 AM Wednesday morning, she doesn't show up. I was a little cranky but I have too much to do to worry about where she's at. So, I leave her a nice message, expressing great concern over her whereabouts. Around 3:00 PM, she calls to say that she missed her flight from Dallas to Atlanta because her traveling partner left her wallet back at her friends house, so after being half way to the airport they had to turn around and go back to get it. So, they didn't get into Atlanta until almost midnight. So they decided to stay in Atlanta for the evening and drive home Wednesday morning.

Here is where the story holds water like a sieve. She told me that she couldn't call because she bought her phone off of E-bay and it didn't come with a car charger, so her battery died. (Did I mention that I bought a phone for her and it is the EXACT same brand of phone she already has and it came with a car charger and she had taken it with her when she left?). She said she had like 20 messages from her mom being completely worried. She said that she was going to write my number down, so that she could put it in her wallet, so she could call me, even if her cell phone died. And she emphasized (maybe 20 times) that this NEVER happens to her. It was really just a string of bad luck and she wouldn't be traveling anymore over the summer, so it wouldn't be a problem.

She asked if she could come at 8:00 AM the next morning to get as many hours in as she could. I, of course, told her that this would be fine and that I'd see her in the morning. Well, I didn't see her in the morning. In fact, I haven't heard from her since last Wednesday. I've left numerous messages on her personal phone, since I have suspended service on my phone. And since she's not returning my calls, I had to fire her over email this morning.

So, I am now assistant-less AND phone-less. I don't expect to see either again. My only saving grace is that I had not yet paid her for the 8 hours she worked for me. So, I guess it's a wash.

And the great PA search of '08 continues!